Wide Awake
by Bookbinder4
Summary: Lorelai and Rory face a difficult ordeal during a time that should have been joyful.
1. Chapter 1

"Rory is there anything wrong, you've been quiet all evening" Emily inquired.

"Nothing's wrong Grandma, I guess I'm just tired."

Emily looked closely at her granddaughter, searching her face. She noticed her eyes were a little red which seemed to back up her statement.

"You go home, have an early night and next week I expect you to be chatting up a storm just like your mother."

Rory's face coloured at the mention of her mother but fortunately Emily didn't seem to notice.

"Goodnight Grandma, thanks for dinner,"

"Your very welcome, drive home safely and tell your mother I expect to see her soon."

Rory nodded uncertainly as she waved goodbye. Once she was inside her car she let out an exhausted sigh, then slowly drove away.

As she reached home she couldn't help another sigh from escaping, the house seemed empty, empty and cold.

Rory opened the door and hesitantly walked up the stairs. Her mothers bedroom door was slightly ajar, so Rory peered inside.

Lorelai was fast asleep, her breathing shallow. A chink of light from the window illuminated her pale face and gave her a strange ethereal appearance.

Rory lingered in the doorway, staring sadly at her mother. Finally she slipped into the room and gently laid down on the bed beside her.

Watching her sleep a tear slowly trickled down her cheek, she wiped it away turning her face and digging it into the pillow.

She was woken in the early hours of the morning by a crying baby, she turned and noticed her mother was missing.

Rory jumped out of bed and followed the sound. Opening the door adjacent to her mothers room she walked into the nursery.

Lorelai was settled in the rocking chair beside the window, gently rocking her baby as she whispered words of comfort.

"Mom I could have helped, why didn't you wake me" asked Rory as she smiled at the sight of her mother with her tiny brother.

"I didn't have the heart to wake you, you looked so peaceful."

"Next time wake me, I don't care how peaceful I look. You go back to bed, I can handle William." Rory replied as she made a move towards William.

"I'm fine and William needs me, besides you can't feed him as far as I know" Lorelai joked.

"We have formula, please Mom you need to go back to bed."

"No I need to be with William, Rory I need him to know who I am" Lorelai pleaded.

"He knows you, trust me he knows you. William loves you."

Lorelai smiled at Rory's words as she gently transferred the little boy to his big sister arms. She kissed his forehead then Rory's cheek affectionately as she moved slowly back to her room.

Rory watched her go as she rocked William sadly, fighting to keep her tears at bay.

Once William had fallen back to sleep, she checked in on Lorelai and found her sound asleep. Her arm was stretched out towards the side where Rory had slept, unconsciously reaching out for her daughter.

Rory laid back down and grasped her mother hand in her own, smiling when she felt her squeezing back.

Lorelai opened her eyes and smiled at her daughter before falling back into a deep slumber.

Rory smiled back but was unsure if her mother had seen before exhaustion had carried her away.


	2. Chapter 2

Rory was feeding William when Lorelai slowly appeared beside her. She held out her arms and Rory skilfully handed him over.

"Have you taken your pills" she asked as she handed Lorelai William's bottle.

"Fully medicated sweets" Lorelai confirmed.

"And your feeling okay, your not dizzy or in any pain. Because you can tell me, I want you to tell me" said Rory hesitantly.

"I'm fine, really I'm feeling fine" Lorelai repeated as she noticed the uncertainty in Rory's eyes.

"How was it last night at your grandparents" Lorelai asked trying to change the subject.

"Grandpa was away on a business trip so it was just me and Grandma. She really wants to see you and William I'm sure."

"Your Grandma only wants to see me to gloat about Luke and as for William she never even came to see him when he was born."

"You told her you didn't want her there. I know she'll love him the moment she sees him. Mom you'll have to see her eventually, you need her as much as she needs you."

"You and William is all I need, please I don't want to talk about Emily anymore."

Rory had something to add but seeing the look in her mothers eyes she quickly changed the conversation.

"So I talked to Sookie yesterday and she said everything is fine at the Inn. She said there's nothing to worry about and that she's dropping off some meals so we won't starve."

"She's been a godsend lately and you, your my angel. I don't know what I would have done without you" said Lorelai sadly.

Rory smiled as she reached around her little brother to give her mother a much needed hug.

* * *

A few hours later Rory was just putting William down in his crib when someone knocked on the door.

She rushed down the stairs mindful that the noise might wake her mother, who was napping on the sofa.

Rory opened the door and gasped when she saw the imposing figure of her grandmother on the other side.

"Grandma" Rory announced taken aback.

"Good afternoon Rory, well are you going to let me in" she asked imperiously.

"Oh, sure come in Grandma. I'm afraid were not too tidy at the moment, William really takes up all are time."

"Where is my little grandson" Emily asked as her sharp eyes appraised the clutter in the hallway.

"You just missed him, he's upstairs sleeping. Why don't you come into the kitchen where I can get you a drink" Rory asked, trying to avoid the living room where Lorelai was asleep.

"No thanks Rory, I'm fine. Where's your mother, surely she's not back at work already."

Rory sighed as she leaned up against the wall, "Mom's sleeping too" she suddenly exclaimed.

Emily looked surprised as she wondered towards the living room, picking up some on Williams toys on her way.

Once she reached the sofa she noticed Lorelai and let a sudden gasp of air escape her mouth.

"Something's wrong" she muttered under her breath.

"What Grandma" Rory asked unclear what she had said.

"What's wrong" she questioned, turning to Rory.

Rory paled at the question desperate to escape, why did she open that door she thought.

"Nothing's wrong" she answered, shocked by her own inability to spin a convincing lie.

"Nothing, nothings wrong. Really Rory your mother looks dreadful. She's so pale" Emily announced sadly as she leaned over her daughter.

"Grandma nothings wrong" Rory whispered, concerned that her mother would wake.

Emily had stopped listening, she was pulling the blanket back, away from her daughter.

She gasped again when she saw Lorelai's frail body, quickly pulling the blanket back into place.

"What happened" she asked sadly, looking away towards the fire place.

"Nothing" Rory said again trying to stifle a sob, "Everything's fine."


	3. Chapter 3

At Rory's utterance Lorelai was awoken by the volume and the desperation coming from her daughter.

"Rory what's wrong" Lorelai asked as she lifted herself up into a sitting position.

Immediately realising what was amiss when her eyes rested on her mothers disapproving face.

"Mom" Lorelai gasped in a panicky voice that was not her own.

"Lorelai what is going on" Emily practically shouted, causing Rory to shift on her feet as thought she was getting ready to run.

In the next second the wails of a baby could be heard over the baby monitor. Lorelai stood up and without another word marched up the stairs towards William's bedroom.

She settled the baby as she rocked him, whispering about his wonderful timing and kissing his downy head.

Rory appeared in the doorway, anxiously pacing and watching to see if her grandmother had followed her upstairs.

"I think we have to tell her" Rory suddenly whispered.

"No, she'll want us to move back in with her. I don't know about you but I'll never go back, I can't. We'll just have to make something up."

"She knows your sick" Rory said sadly.

"How"

"She may not be your ideal mother, but she is a mother. She saw your face and put two and two together. Grandma knows your keeping things from her, just like you would know if I was."

Lorelai slumped into the rocking chair, William still snuggled tightly in her arms.

"Mom, are you okay" Rory asked as she knelt down beside her.

"Dizzy" was all Lorelai could manage as she looked down at William, who was smiling happily up at her.

Rory took the baby and gently placed him back in his crib. She helped Lorelai up and steered her towards her bed in the room next door.

Lorelai laid down closing her eyes, as Rory reached for the pills on the bedside cabinet.

"Mom, you need to take one of these. Then you'll feel better."

Lorelai swayed as she tried to take the pill Rory offered. Once it was down she fell back onto the bed and sighed.

"Are you feeling any better" Rory asked uncertainly as she pulled a blanket over her mother.

"I'm fine" she replied, her words contradicting her appearance as she clutched her hand to the mattress.

Rory waited with her until she heard her grandma call out from the staircase.

"Go, I'm fine" Lorelai said softly.

Rory reached Emily before she could ascend the stairs and pulled her back into the living room.

"Look Mom's really busy with William. She's fine really, I just think she misses Luke.

When he left she was down for a while, lost weight and stopped going out. But she's getting back to her old self and I'm sure she will come back to Friday night dinners soon."

Emily looked uncertainly at Rory as she struggled to keep up with her granddaughters sudden speech.

"If anything was wrong you'd tell me, wouldn't you" Emily demanded.

Rory took a deep breath she hated lying to her grandmother, but she couldn't tell her the truth not now anyway.

"I'd tell you if anything was wrong" she said trying to look as creditable as ever.

"Thank you" said Emily as she reached for her purse and made a move to leave.

Rory walked her to the door and waved goodbye, unnerved by the guilt she felt as Emily drove away.

"I'm Sorry" Rory said softly as she watched the last glimpse of Emily's car disappear in the distance.


	4. Chapter 4

Rory was making up a bottle for William when the phone rang. She rushed to pick it up before it woke those who were sleeping.

"Hello" she gasped a little out of breath.

"Lorelai" asked a male voice on the other line.

"Luke?"

"Rory, I'm..." there was a pause on the line and Rory called out hoping he was still there.

"Rory, I'm sorry" he finally managed to get out.

"Luke please come back, I need you. William needs you and Mom..."

"Don't" Luke asked passionately cutting her off, "Just don't."

"Mom needs you" she shouted unwilling to cut her speech short.

Luke was quiet for a while, Rory could hear him breathing or struggling to breathe.

"Luke?" she asked repeatedly worried by his silence.

Finally Luke made a sound as he attempted to speak again, his voice gravelly and uneven.

"How is she" he said softly.

"Not good, Grandma was over earlier and upset her. She's sleeping now" said Rory.

Luke cursed at the mention of Emily then sighed audibly as he thought about what to say.

"I'm sorry I left you to pick up the pieces. I just, I can't do this, I'm sorry Rory. Don't tell her I called, it won't help."

"Luke wait don't go" Rory begged but it was too late he was gone.

Rory dropped the phone and sank down towards the floor silently sobbing, she was exhausted and frustrated by everything.

Falling asleep at night was hard, she was so worried about her Mom and concerned about William.

She never did leave to start her new job and now someone else had taken her place. She hadn't talked with her friends or even left the house in weeks.

Ever since Luke left Rory had been her mothers rock, she knew Lorelai hadn't wanted Rory to sacrifice for her. But Rory couldn't and wouldn't leave her, especially now when she was sick and alone.

Deep down Rory didn't even care anymore. All she cared about was being there for her Mom, because her Mom had always been there for her.

As Rory lay sobbing on the ground she felt a icy hand stroke across her back. She looked up and saw Lorelai gently soothing her, a desperate ache lingering in her eyes.

"Rory why don't you take a break, visit with Lane or go and have a lie down" she said.

"I'm fine" she sniffed as Lorelai handed her a tissue from her pocket.

"It's clean, I promise" she said smiling as she stroked Rory's hair from her face.

Rory smiled back as she wiped away her tears and blew her nose on the tissue.

"Do you want to talk about it" Lorelai asked as she pulled Rory up off the floor.

"Not right now" she replied.

Lorelai reached for her daughter and gave her a hug, while Rory struggled to keep it together.

"I'm sorry baby, I never wanted this for you. Please don't be sad, things will get better" Lorelai whispered softly.

"Or worse" Rory let slip without meaning too.

Lorelai squeezed tighter at her words but didn't reply, she couldn't.

"I'm sorry this happened" was all she could say as she tired to comfort the best friend she had ever had.


	5. Chapter 5

Reluctantly Rory went out to take a walk, hoping the fresh air would help to clear her head.

William was still asleep and Lorelai had promised to do nothing more than sit and watch TV.

She wondered around Stars Hollow with no set course, surprised when she found herself standing outside Luke's.

The diner was closed and had been ever since Luke had walked away from it, when he first realised something was wrong with Lorelai.

Rory stared at the diner thinking back to before her brother was born and before everything had fallen apart.

Six months earlier.

Rory was standing in the diner waiting for Luke to appear on the stairs from his apartment.

"Come on were going to be late, Mom's waiting in the car" she shouted.

Luke raced down the stairs, his shoes clutched tightly in his hands.

"Luke you can put your shoes on, I'll meet you in the car" Rory said as she ran back outside.

Luke pulled them onto his feet without looking, as he ran to catch up. This was Lorelai's eighth check up with her doctor and the second time that Rory had managed to come along.

Yale was keeping her busy with finals coming up and interviews for possible work placements.

Lorelai watched as Luke flew into the car, sweeping her eyes over his windswept hair and down to his feet.

"Honey the right shoe goes on the right foot, I thought you had this down" she smirked.

Luke looked down and sighed quickly swapping his shoes around hoping Rory hadn't seen.

"Relax, so we're late it's not the end of the world" she said softly as she stroked his arm.

"I hate being late" he grunted as he started the car, pulling away and driving towards the freeway.

He was more flustered than usual about today's appointment because lately he had grown concerned that something was wrong.

Lorelai had been so tired the last few weeks and recently developed a cough she just couldn't shift.

"How are you feeling" Luke asked as Lorelai cleared her throat in the passenger seat.

"I'm fine, really Luke I feel great today" she smiled.

Luke smiled back trying to put his mind at ease, maybe he was just being paranoid.

After the ultrasound Luke decided to air his concerns, hoping the doctor would allay his fears.

He told her about the cough and Lorelai's constant fatigue he even remembered last week when she complained she couldn't catch her breath after climbing the stairs.

The doctor said they were probably just the symptoms of pregnancy but decided to send Lorelai for some tests just to be safe.

Two hours later they were back in the doctors office waiting for the all clear, Lorelai impatient to get home and off her feet.

"Luke really all this fuss for nothing, I have a cold that's all" she said.

"I need to know that's all it is" replied Luke as he held tightly to her hand.

Lorelai sat back in her chair and sighed hoping the wait wouldn't be much longer.

Eventually the doctor appeared, her stern face frightening Rory and even causing Lorelai to worry.

She sat down next to Lorelai pulling her chair up close as she sympathetically reached over and patted her arm.

"Lorelai I'm afraid the tests revealed an abnormality with your heart, we'll need to run more tests to confirm a diagnosis. I'm sorry but I want to admit you so your health can be monitored."

"What" Lorelai questioned as she struggled to make sense of what she had been told.

"No Mom has a cold, she's fine it's just a cold" Rory rambled as Lorelai reached for her hand.

Luke remained quiet unable to comprehend the doctors words, his face turning white.

The doctor was talking again but he couldn't hear her, he was light headed and feeling sick to his stomach.

Luke watched Lorelai being brave for her daughter as she listened to the doctors words. He reached over and kissed her cheek then quickly excused himself.

"Restrooms" he asked an orderly who was walking along the corridor outside.

"Down there on the left" he pointed as Luke followed his direction.

He raced into a stall and unceremoniously emptied the contents of his stomach into the toilet. When he stopped retching he rinsed out his mouth and tried to pull himself together.

Finally after wiping away some tears and shouting a few profanities he managed to go back to that room that had broken him.

Lorelai looked up as he walked back and reached for his hand. Luke let her take it as he sat back down in his chair.

"You all right" she asked,

"Fine" was all he could manage.


	6. Chapter 6

Lorelai was admitted to the cardiology unit, where she stayed for the rest of her pregnancy.

Her cardiologist put her thought a series of tests including chest x-rays, a chest CT scan and an echocardiogram. On day two he had a diagnosis and immediately went to inform his patient.

Doctor Stephens knocked on the door as he walked inside, surprised when he saw all the visitors in the room.

"Could I speak privately with Miss Gilmore" he asked the room at large.

Several people moved to leave wishing Lorelai well and hoping everything would be all right. Finally the room had thinned leaving only Luke and Rory, who wouldn't leave.

The doctor allowed them to stay, realising his patient would need their support once he had explained her condition. He moved around the bed and pulled up a recently vacated chair. Sitting down he took a deep breath, looked down at the chart in his hand and begun.

"The tests have confirmed that you do have a serious heart condition" he explained. Looking down at his chart he missed the frightened expressions of all three left in the room. "Lorelai has a condition called Peripartum cardiomyopathy. It is a relatively rare disorder and is usually diagnosed within the final months of pregnancy or after delivery."

All three looked up at his words, wanting him to expand but all unable to communicate as the shock overwhelmed them.

Luke was the first to find his voice, his hand tightly clasped to Lorelai's. "How did this happen" he finally choked out.

"We don't really know the causes of dilated cardiomyopathy, there are risk factors but nothing concrete." he explained.

"Dilated cardiomyopathy" Rory questioned "You said something different a minute ago."

"Miss Gilmore has..." he was cut off by Lorelai. "Please call me Lorelai, if your going to break this kind of news please call me Lorelai" she said sadly.

He nodded his head and continued, "Lorelai has Peripartum cardiomyopathy which is a form of Dilated cardiomyopathy. The Peripartum part means that the condition occurs during pregnancy and sometimes shortly afterwards."

Rory nodded her head in understanding, but was still far from satisfied with his explanation.

"Can you explain more about cardiomyopathy" she asked as she pulled a notebook out of her bag and began to take notes.

"Cardiomypathy occurs when there is damage to the heart. As a result the heart muscle becomes weak and cannot pump blood efficiently. Decreased heart function

affects the lungs, liver and other body systems. Peripartum cardiomyopathy is a form of Dilated cardiomyopathy in which no other cause of heart dysfunction can be identified."

Rory wrote furiously as she tried to get everything down on paper so she could research it later on. Lorelai looked overwhelmed by all the information while Luke looked down at his hands, a strange emptiness in his eyes.

"What's going to happen" Luke suddenly asked.

"We can treat the symptoms of the condition with medication, Digitalis to strengthen the heart's pumping ability and beta-blockers. Hopefully the condition will improve and the symptoms will lessen in time."

"And if they don't" Lorelai asked.

"If nothing improves in the next six months then the condition could prove to be more serious. Sometimes in extreme cases the heart muscle becomes so weak that the only cause of treatment would be a heart transplant."

At his words everyone openly gasped, Rory and Luke looked over at Lorelai then quickly looked away.

"I can't stress enough that the need for a transplant is very unlikely. For now we'll just monitor the condition and hope the medication will be effective. Now I understand you have developed a cough and experienced periods of fatigue, have you had any other symptoms."

Lorelai cast her mind back over the last few weeks, trying her best to remember. "I have had some palpitations, but I thought it was due to the pregnancy."

"Any shortness of breath" he asked as he too began to take notes. "A few times, I guess" she replied.

Doctor Stephens nodded his head then suddenly stood up from his chair. "I'll begin the medication immediately, I'm afraid you'll need to stay in the hospital for a while for observation."

With that he left them alone, closing the door quietly behind him. "Great bedside manner that one, I feel wonderfully well informed" Lorelai said sarcastically.

"Maybe we should get a second opinion" queried Rory as she skimmed through her notes. Luke remained silent a thoughtful look on his pale drawn face.

"Are you okay" Rory asked abandoning her notebook and sitting down on the bed beside her Mom. "I guess" she said softly. But seeing the fear in her daughters eyes she quickly added "I'm fine, really I'm going to be just fine."

Rory nodded as a tear fell down her cheek, she brushed it away and reached over to give Lorelai a hug. Lorelai hugged back, hoping Rory hadn't seen the tears in her own eyes.

They stayed wrapped in each others arms completely forgetting that Luke was even there. He watched them embrace then had to look away fearing he would break down too.

Eventually Lorelai remembered his presence and pulled on his hand. "Luke come here, please" she asked. He reached over and gave each Gilmore girl a loving squeeze, his tears finally falling and mixing with theirs.


	7. Chapter 7

Lorelai had a lengthy stay in the hospital and partly due to her fathers recent heart attack she kept the information from her parents. Rory lied at first and told them that her Mom and Luke had gone away for a short holiday. Then after William was born the caesarean helped to explain Lorelai's extended stay in the hospital.

A caesarean was performed to prevent any unnecessary strain on Lorelai's heart during labour. William was delivered safely and healthy, he was monitored to make sure the medications hadn't effected him and discharged three days later.

"I miss him" Lorelai lamented as she looked down at a photograph Luke had taken of William the day before. "Luke's bringing him back for a visit tomorrow and soon we will all be together again" said Rory as she rested her head on Lorelai's shoulder. "He's going to forget all about me."

"Never" said Rory smiling, "That's not possible." Lorelai smiled back at Rory's words as she leaned back on her pillow.

"How are you feeling" Rory asked, watching her mother as she closed her eyes.

"Okay, a little sore but otherwise I feel fine."

"Your tired though, do you want me to leave you for a while" asked Rory.

"No, I like that your here. I can comfort myself that at least one of my babies didn't leave me." Lorelai joked.

Rory smiled back and patted her mothers arm affectionately. "Get some rest and I promise you I'll be here when you wake."

Lorelai closed her eyes again and quickly drifted off, her hand still holding tight to the photograph. Rory leaned back and closed her own eyes equally exhausted. It had been a very eventful few weeks, worrying about her Mom and the baby. On Lorelai's instruction demolishing part of Lorelai's new bedroom to create a nursery for William.

Luke and Rory had painted the room together, while Lorelai had ordered the furniture and addition supplies online from her hospital bed.

The whole town had each bought something for the baby, all presented to Lorelai at her impromptu baby shower held at the hospital. All organised by Sookie and Lane, who each wanted to do something to cheer up Lorelai, Rory and Luke.

While the girls were sleeping Luke was at home gently rocking his new born son. He had moved into Lorelai's house to help with William and be there for her when she returned. They had been dating for over a year, Rory leaving Yale being the catalyst for their changing relationship. Luke had been so supportive during Lorelai's and Rory's estrangement that they naturally grew closer.

After learning about the pregnancy Luke had proposed, but fearing that the baby was the only cause for the proposal Lorelai had refused. Luke didn't give up on the idea  
though and shortly before they found out about her heart condition she had said yes.

Since recent events the wedding had been all but forgotten, as they were all too focused on getting Lorelai home and well.

Finally when William was almost three weeks old Lorelai was discharged from the hospital. She was on an assortment of medication and required to take it easy, but she was going home and was happy.

For several months they were almost happy, Luke worked less hours so he could help Lorelai take care of William and herself. Rory graduated from Yale and plans for the Danes, Gilmore wedding began again.

Then one summer evening everything changed, when Luke came home to find his baby screaming.

He picked him up out of the travel cot they kept downstairs and tried to stop his tears.

"What's up little man" he said softly as he rocked the little boy on his hip. "Where's Mommy" he asked while he moved from room to room looking for Lorelai.

Luke climbed the stairs calling out her name as he continued to bounce William in his arms.

As he walked into their bedroom his face suddenly fell, she was there on the floor beside the door and she wasn't moving.

Luke laid William on the floor and raced towards Lorelai, fear gripping his heart causing him to panic.

He shouted her name repeatedly, scaring William and making him cry again. With shaking hands he tried to feel for a pulse but there was nothing.

"Lorelai, please don't" he whispered as he began compressions on her chest.

The noise created by William caused Babette to wonder over to the house, concerned that the baby had been left alone. She ran up the stairs to find Luke giving Lorelai mouth to mouth. "Call an ambulance" he said in a strange voice that terrified his neighbour.

Babette raced for a phone leaving Luke distraught as he resumed the compressions. Once an ambulance had been called she returned and picked up the baby, taking him away to the nursery.

"Please don't go" she heard Luke repeat as she walked away. Babette looked back thinking he was speaking to her, but he wasn't and she knew it when she saw his face.

He was a broken man, a look of horror etched so clearly on his face that she doubted it would ever leave. There were no tears, only desperate groans as he worked to bring her back. Shock shaking his solid frame and turning his skin a dreadful white.


	8. Chapter 8

The paramedics arrived Babette rushing them upstairs to where Luke was still working on Lorelai. They used the paddles on her chest, Luke watching as her body momentarily jumped up off the floor.

He tell out gasp and turned away unable to watch anymore. Babette sat down beside him and wrapped her arm around his shoulders. She didn't speak as she tried to shield him, afraid of what he would do if Lorelai didn't come back.

"Stop there's a rhythm" one of the paramedics shouted to his partner, before he could shock her again.

Luke looked up in disbelief, looking back at Lorelai who remained still and lifeless on the ground.

The paramedics quickly moved her onto a stretcher and carried her outside towards the ambulance. "Can I go with her" Luke asked softly as he hurried behind the men.

They allowed Luke to come along, as they settled Lorelai into the ambulance. He called to Babette and asked her to stay with William, then climbed inside his whole body still shaking from shock.

Lorelai was stable throughout the journey, although she never regained consciousness.

Luke sat as close to her as he could, his hands fisted into balls on his lap. Watching her chest slowly rise and fall and praying it would continue.

Once they arrived she was rushed into the emergency room, Luke running along side as they wheeled her away.

* * *

Babette was rocking William to sleep, nervously pacing the nursery when she heard a door bang shut. She laid him in his cot and quietly crept out of his room to investigate.

"Mom, Mom guess what" she heard Rory call as she came down the stairs. "Mom where are you" she called again, stopping abruptly when she saw Babette on the stairs.

"Babette" she said surprised, panic suddenly surrounding her when she saw her eyes.

"What's wrong" Rory gasped as Babette engulfed her in her arms.

"Come sit down" said Babette pulling her towards the sofa. Rory followed and sat down to stunned to argue.

"Your Mom was taken to the hospital a few minutes ago, Luke went with her" she said sadly.

"What, why" asked Rory in a small childlike voice. Babette took a deep breath as she tried her best to explain what had happened. Rory listened tears falling down her cheek and onto Babette's shirt soaking it through.

Once Rory was a little more settled Babette called Morey and asked him to come over. "Sugar Morey's coming over to take you to the hospital, your not driving in this condition." Rory just nodded to upset to make her own decisions and waited for Morey.

* * *

Luke was pacing back and forth in the waiting area, several people looking up and giving him a wary glance. Luke had been ordered to wait here after he broke down in the emergency room shortly after Lorelai was taken away.

He was still shaking uncontrollably and fighting the nausea from being back at the hospital.

"Excuse me sir, can I get you some water" asked a women he remembered seeing when they first arrived. Luke looked up but was unable to reply, the words getting stuck in his throat.

She steered him towards a chair and motioned for him to sit down. "Can I get you anything" she asked again.

Luke shook his head as it dropped into his hands while she patted his shoulder. "She's in the best place, your wife's surrounded by people who can help."

At the word wife Luke suddenly broke down again, tears dropping into his hands as his shoulders shook with each sob.

The woman looked around concerned, as more people in the waiting room looked up. She handed him a tissue as she tried to calm him down, gently patting his back.

"Luke" someone shouted, they both looked up to see a young woman race towards them. "Luke" she repeated, stepping back in fear when she saw his face.

Luke stood up and made an attempt to embrace her but Rory jumped aside. "No where is she, is she okay" Rory asked her eyes searching for her mother.

"I don't know, I haven't seen her since we arrived in the ambulance."

"I want to see her" she demanded tears falling again from her red blotchy eyes.

"I work here, maybe I can find out what's happening" the woman beside Luke said to Rory. "Please" both Rory and Luke replied, Rory finally falling into Luke's waiting arms.

They watched her walk away, both silently praying that everything would be okay.

Luke helped Rory into a chair and held her hand while they waited for news. He was still trembling unable to stop, his eyes haunted by what he had seen.

They both jumped up when they saw her reappear, dashing towards her. She directed them back to the chairs and slowly began to explain the situation. "I spoke to a doctor, he said he was going to send someone out to speak to you soon. He told me your wife is stable but still very weak."

Luke squeezed Rory's hand tightly as he let the words sink in. Rory just stared too numb to feel the pressure Luke was creating.

A doctor appeared sometime later calling for the family of Miss Gilmore, Rory and Luke stood and walked towards him. He ushered them into a private room and asked them to take a seat.

"Miss Gilmore is awake and has been asking about her son. She's afraid she left him alone." the doctor said.

Luke smiled at his words glad to know that Lorelai was conscious and cogent. "What happened" he asked.

"Miss Gilmore told us she experienced some chest pain and shortness of breath prior to her collapse. When the paramedics arrived she was tachycardic, meaning her heart rate was beating too fast. The defibrillator they used helped return her heart rate to a normal rhythm." he explained.

"Why did this happen" Luke asked.

"I believe the arrhythmia was due to a complication of her existing heart condition. We may need to change her medication or it could be a sign that her heart muscle has deteriorated. She will have to stay in the hospital for the time being for observation and further tests."

Luke felt sick as he listened, Lorelai wasn't getting any better in fact she was worse.

"Could this happen again" asked Rory finally finding her voice. "It's very possible, she may need a pacemaker in time. I understand this is all very upsetting but Miss Gilmore's heart was restored to a normal rhythm and she is making steady progress."

Luke continued to look alarmed as Rory asked if she could see her mother. The doctor escorted them through the corridor and led them into a small room set to the side.

Inside was Lorelai sat up in bed with wires attached to her chest and arms. She was also connected to a nasal cannula that was providing a steady stream of oxygen.

"Mom" Rory exclaimed as she swept into the room, her eyes taking in all the equipment that surrounded her mother.

"My baby" said Lorelai as she reached out for Rory. "I'm sorry for scaring you" she said as she started to cry.

Rory instantly joined in as more tears began to fall from her eyes. "I'm sorry" Lorelai kept repeating as she held Rory close afraid to let go.

Luke was also in tears watching their reunion, anxious to join in but also fearful of getting to close.

Finally he made his way over to the bed and reached for her hand. Lorelai looked up and smiled when she saw his face, then suddenly looked away.

"Lorelai are you all right" he asked when he noticed her reaction. "What happened to you" she trembled as she reached her hand up to his face.

"I almost lost you" he said softly, tenderly holding her hand to his face.


	9. Chapter 9

"Where's William" Lorelai asked once everyone had calmed down. "Is he all right, I could hear him crying but I couldn't get up."

"William's fine, he's at home Babette's watching him" Luke answered as he kissed her hand. "He's really okay, he was crying so loudly."

"Lorelai William's great, I'll go get him right now if you'd like" said Luke. "No don't, not now. I don't want to upset him again, I'm a mess."

"Your perfect" Luke announced, leaning over to kiss her on the lips. "Love you" he said looking into her eyes and smiling, Lorelai smiled back "I love you too."

Lorelai looked over at Rory who was sitting close by and said "I love you too sweets."

Rory gave her a broken smile as she replied "I love you too Mom."

Once the sentimentality had ended, Lorelai became more subdued as exhaustion overwhelmed her. She was fighting to stay awake, until Luke leaned over and encouraged her to rest. Once Lorelai was asleep Luke and Rory waited beside her for a few hours. The doctor returned to check on his patient, suggesting that the pair go home and get some sleep.

Luke wouldn't leave Lorelai but realised that Rory should be at home. He wanted her to be able to rest in her own bed and also be there for William.

"I can't leave her" she said at Luke's suggestion.

"I'll be here and I promise to call you when your Mom wakes up."

Rory looked back at Lorelai uncertainly, then remembered her brother who was all alone with a neighbour he didn't really know.

"I'll go home for William's sake, but I'm coming back the minute you call and William's coming too."

Luke hugged Rory amazed at her maturity in thinking of her brother before herself.

Rory gently kissed Lorelai goodnight then quietly left the room with Luke. "Wait how did you get here" asked Luke. "Morey gave me a lift because Babette wouldn't let me drive myself."

"No, I don't think any of us were up to driving today. Will you be all right with a taxi or do you want one of your friends to take you home." Luke asked.

Rory looked at the time and decided on a taxi, not wanting to call anyone so late. Luke paid for the taxi then waved her off, before returning to Lorelai who was still fast asleep.

During the night Luke unknowingly fell asleep, exhausted from the events of the day. He slept awkwardly on a chair beside the bed, turning often and occasionally groaning in his sleep.

Suddenly he shot up out of the chair, falling hard on the floor and looking around disorientated. Luke noticed Lorelai asleep on her side, the moonlight highlighting the paleness of her skin then it hit him. Everything came back to him, every memory every touch and every painful second of the day before.

Luke dashed from the room and raced to the nearest restroom, where he was violently sick. He staggered against the toilet, alarmed by the sounds of someone sobbing uncontrollably. Luke listened intently shocked by the volume and broken moans, then he saw his reflection in a mirror and realisation came crashing down.

It was him making all the noise, it was him who was crying. He sank to the ground as visions of Lorelai unconscious on their bedroom floor swam through his mind.

He could smell her hair against his nose, taste her lips as he blew air into her lungs. He felt her body beneath his hands as he pushed down on her chest and remembered the desolation he felt when her beautiful eyes didn't open.

Luke heaved again as he tried to shake away the memory, Lorelai dead in his arms and his baby crying in the background.

Then a painful realisation struck him, he stood up and walked towards the mirror. Coldly looking at his reflection as he quietly whispered "I can't do this."

When Lorelai woke Luke was there but there was something in his face that troubled her.

Days when by and Luke grew more and more distant. He stopped looking at her in the eyes when she spoke and became uneasy when she was asleep.

Then the that day Lorelai was discharged from the hospital Luke disappeared, Rory looked but couldn't find him.

A few days later he turned up unexpectedly on their doorstep, a packed bag resting on his shoulder.

"Can I speak with Lorelai" he asked as Rory opened the door. She shook her head then moved to slam the door in his face.

"Please" he shouted, pushing his body against the door to prevent it from closing.

"You hurt her, how could you" said Rory sadly. Luke bowed his head at her words, ashamed by what he had done.

It was then that Rory noticed the bag he was carrying, "Going somewhere" she asked.

"I'm leaving Stars Hollow, I'm sorry but I can't stay here anymore" he said.

Forgetting her anger Rory's face suddenly grew pale, "Why" she said softly.

Luke took a deep breath unnerved by the heartbreak in the girls face. A girl he loved almost as much as her mother. "Rory I'm so sorry, I just can't be here. I can't bear coming home and finding her like that again."

He started to cry, shaking uncontrollably "Tell Lorelai I'm sorry, she deserves someone much stronger than me."

Luke pounded his hand into the wall, blood dripping down onto his shirt. "I'm sorry" he muttered as he darted towards his truck.

Rory watched him drive away, her face inscrutable. She didn't call him back, she just watched frozen as the man they had always depended on let them down.


	10. Chapter 10

It had now been almost a month since Luke had walked away and in that time he had called just once.

Rory sighed tearing her eyes away from the diner and walking back swiftly to her once happy home.

She noticed a sleek black car in the driveway and immediately panicked thinking her grandmother had returned. Though as she came closer she realised the car was unfamiliar and sighed in relief.

Cautiously she opened the front door, immediately hearing her mothers voice happily chatting to the stranger.

Rory walked quickly towards the voices, desperately hoping Luke had returned but knowing deep down it was a female voice she could hear.

Lorelai looked up as she saw Rory dash inside, her face flushed from her walk.

"Did you know about this" she asked gesturing towards the woman sitting beside her and smiling.

"Mia" Rory exclaimed rushing forwards and hugging the small lady happily. Mia hugged back equally thrilled to see the young woman she had known since infancy.

"What are you doing here" she asked moving back so she could see her face.

"Well I was in Connecticut visiting John and decided I would stop by and see my girls before I went home."

Both Lorelai and Rory beamed at her words, "It's not just us girls anymore" said Lorelai. "That's right, where is that little baby I'm dying to meet him."

"He was sleeping when I left, how about we go up see if he's awake" said Rory.

Mia jumped up anxious to see William for the first time, while Lorelai slowly got up to join them. "Sit back down I'll get him if he's awake and bring him down" Rory whispered to he mother. Lorelai looked over at Mia making sure she hadn't heard then slipped back down on the sofa.

Rory led the way to the nursery and peered in through the partially open door. William was fast asleep his little rosy face peacefully peeking out from his blanket. "Oh would you look at that, he's beautiful" said Mia as she also poked her head inside the nursery. "Defiantly my favourite brother" Rory replied with a smile.

As they were walking back down the hall Mia suddenly grabbed hold of Rory's hand and pulled her into Lorelai's bedroom. Shutting the door behind her she motioned for Rory to keep her voice low. "Mia what's going on" Rory whispered uncertainly.

"I know" said Mia. "Know what?" Rory replied flatly trying to keep her voice level.

"Rory please, I know about your mother. Look I spoke to Luke a few days ago and he told me everything."

Rory slumped onto the bed shocked by her words. Bending over she laid her head in her hands and let go. Sobbing Rory finally let out all the pain she had been holding onto, Mia took her in her arms and held tight.

"Why didn't you call me sweetheart, I'd have been here in an instant" said Mia soothingly. Rory tried to respond but her intermittent sobs prevented much speech.

Mia gently rocked her in her arms, something she hadn't done since Rory was a baby. Finally soothing her and bringing her some much needed peace.

"I'm sorry it's been so hard on you. But your not to worry anymore I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Howard understands and he wants me to stay for as long as you both need me."

Rory tired to decline the offer, not wanting to put Mia out. But her good sense prevailed and full of gratitude she thanked her sincerely.

Before anything else could be discussed they were startled by the sounds of William waking from his nap. Rory moved quickly to the nursery, smiling at the sight of her brothers toothless grin. "Hey baby, did you have a nice nap" she asked reaching down and picking him out of his crib.

William gurgled in response, happily smiling at his sister. He noticed Mia standing by the door and his smile instantly vanished. "This is Mia" Rory said to William, bouncing him in her arms. "Mia say hello to William" she said moving towards her.

"Hello William, aren't you a handsome little guy" she cooed while William stared at her uncertainly.

"Will you look at those eyes, my he's going to break hearts with those" Mia exclaimed. Rory smiled as she continued to bounce him trying to get him to smile again. "I'm glad he got the Gilmore eyes, a perfect replica of Moms and mine."

"I think he got Lorelai's hair too, it's so much darker than yours when you were a baby." Mia remarked.

Rory was glad but in so many ways William was Luke through and through. Every feature was Luke's in miniature, he even prevented Lorelai's love of coffee during her pregnancy.

"Do you want to hold him" asked Rory. "Do you think he'll mind, I don't want to upset him." "He'll be fine, he just needs to get to know you" Rory replied as she shifted him in her arms and passed him over to Mia.

Mia's face lit up as she held William, bouncing him like Rory had and smiling at him happily. William watched her face intently, taking her in then surprising everyone by smiling back.

"See I'm a hit" Mia bragged proudly. "Don't get cocky the instant he sees Mom we'll instantly be rejected."

Once his diaper had been changed, they all went back downstairs to find Lorelai waiting patiently. "My baby" she cooed standing up and reaching for William.

William's tiny hands reached out as soon as he heard her voice, smiling contently as he was lifted into her arms.

"Hey baby" Lorelai said softly gently kissing the top of his head. "I missed you" she continued holding him close as she tickled his toes. His laughter instantly filled the room making everyone present join in.

"Oh Lorelai he's wonderful" Mia remarked. "He's defiantly a keeper" said Lorelai.

"Defiantly" Rory returned.


	11. Chapter 11

When Lorelai learned that Mia wanted to stay and help out, she suddenly broke down in tears. Rory had taken William out for a drive so both women were alone in the house.

"Who told you" she asked between sobs. "Luke called he didn't want you to be alone." "Then he shouldn't have left" said Lorelai coldly.

"He told me you wouldn't tell your parents" said Mia quickly changing the subject.

Lorelai sighed putting her hand to her head, "Lorelai honey are you okay" Mia asked concerned.

"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'M FINE" she shouted abruptly, causing Mia to jump back in her seat.

"My daughters stuck here taking care of me and her brother, all her dreams of becoming a journalist ruined by me. The man I wanted to marry has disappeared, right when I needed him the most. My parents are clueless and I doubt they'd be much help even if they knew. I can't walk up the stairs without getting breathless and I'm scared all the time, I'm just so scared" Lorelai ranted wiping away a few tears.

Mia listened sadly to Lorelai's rant, shocked by her desperation and sudden anger.

"What's scaring you" Mia asked, pulling Lorelai into her arms and gently stroking her back.

"Everything" she sobbed, allowing Mia to give her some much needed comfort.

Mia waited for Lorelai to elaborate, holding her tightly as she softly sobbed.

"I'm scared I'm going to die" she finally let out between sobs, "I'm scared William won't remember me and that Rory won't ever forget."

Mia had to stifle her own sobs at Lorelai's words, hearing the heartbreak in her voice was devastating.

She tightened her hold, truly shocked that the bravest person she knew was terrified.

"Sweetheart it's natural to be scared, you've had so many things to deal with. I want to tell you that everything's going to be fine but I can't. I'm so sorry Lorelai but I know you and I know how strong you are. You won't go down without a fight and you would never leave those kids unless you had no choice."

"I'm sorry" Lorelai confessed after a long drawn-out silence. Mia looked down confused "Now what do you have to be sorry about."

"I'm sorry I fell apart in front of you."

"I'm not, I'm even glad it's not good to keep things bottled up."

"True, I'm just glad I didn't snap in front of Rory, she's already been through far too much."

When Rory got back a little later she found her mother fast asleep on the sofa and Mia sitting beside her holding tight to her hand.

"Everything okay" she asked holding her brother who was wide awake despite the drive.

"Everything's fine" she said looking up, gently releasing her grip on Lorelai's hand.

Rory could tell both women had been crying but decided for the time being not to mention it.

Instead Rory looked at the time and hurried to make a bottle for William. "Can I help with anything" Mia asked watching Rory as she walked off towards the kitchen.

"You could order us some take out, what do you fancy" Rory asked.

"How about I cook us all something. Since I married Howard I never get to cook anymore."

"That sounds great, but I don't think we have much to make a dinner from. We mostly just order out or Sookie sends us things we can warm up.

"I'll go to the store and pick up some things, how about I make us my famous pot roast."

"I'll go to the store, you just arrived. Write down what you need and I'll be back in no time" said Rory.

"You've had your hands full all day, stay with William and I'll be back soon" Mia insisted, picking up her purse and walking towards the door.

"Okay" said Rory uncertainly as she watched her leave, William still clinging to her shirt.

While Mia was gone she fed William, changed him and dressed him for bed. Periodically checking on Lorelai who remained sleeping the whole time.

On her return from putting William down she noticed Lorelai stir and when to sit beside her.

"Hey" she said softly as Lorelai slowly sat up.

"Hey sweets, where's your brother" she asked looking around as she stretched out her arms.

"I just put him to bed, it's almost six."

"It's six" she said surprised, "I missed him."

"I'm sure he'll be up again, you can see him then" Rory placated.

Lorelai looked back at her daughter and smiled, reaching for her and pulling her closer.

"I talked to Mia this afternoon and she's going to stay for awhile. That means you won't have to be everything for everyone. I want you to be what you've always wanted to be and I will not be the obstacle that stands in your way anymore."

"Mom you never stood in my way not ever and I'm here because I want to be here."

"I don't want you to resent me and you will if you stay much longer. I'd hate it if I never got to see you be a journalist. I'd hate it and you'd hate me."

Rory tightened her grip on Lorelai ashamed by the truth in her mothers words.

"I can't be a journalist, not now" she said sadly.

"Why not, I'm not going anywhere and I have Mia here."

"Mom Mia can't stay forever, what happens when she has to go home."

"There's Sookie and Jackson and Babette right next door. I could hire someone to help me with William and there's always your grandparents if I get really desperate."

Rory looked unconvinced but finally decided to look for work when things became more settled.

Lorelai tried to get her to commit to something sooner but Rory wouldn't agree. "When you tell Grandma and Grandpa that's when I'll look for work" she decided.

Lorelai dropped her head back and sighed, knowing she'd do anything for Rory but not that, not yet.


	12. Chapter 12

Luke watched the line dangle over the side of his small boat, mist hanging in the air and leaving tiny drops of moisture on his clothes and hair.

Staring blankly at the water he was consumed with grief and a painful aching he knew he had caused.

He left the only woman he'd ever loved and worse he'd done it when she'd needed him the most.

Angry by the events that had led him here, he suddenly snapped the fishing rod in half and threw the pieces into the water below.

He shouted out into the mist and smashed his fists onto the stern of the boat. "Why" he called over and over until his throat was raw and his voice gone.

Collapsing into the boat exhausted drawing deep laboured breaths he finally broke down and wept.

Alone in a vast ocean Luke sobbed like a child, only stopping when his body could take no more and he blacked out. Swallowed up by his own darkness Luke reluctantly found some peace.

* * *

Friday night Rory was getting dressed in her mothers room, her own see had given to Mia on that first night.

She pulled on a blue print dress then when in search of a jacket to match. Running down the stairs she saw Mia happily bouncing William in her arms. Lorelai was laying beside them smiling each time he gurgled and laughed.

"I'll be back before nine" said Rory optimistically, reaching down and kissing her brothers rosy cheek.

"Just drive safely sweets" Lorelai replied reaching over to kiss Rory goodbye.

"Bye" she called as she slipped out the door and hurried over to her car.

As she drove to Hartford she reflected on the week that had passed. Mia had truly been a godsend especially on Thursday when Lorelai collapsed.

It had been a hectic week with William teething and Rory lending a hand at the Dragonfly during an unexpected busy spell. Mia was still getting used to their routine and Lorelai was busy trying to prove to Rory that things could function without her.

Thursday afternoon Mia was putting William down for a nap and Rory was cleaning the dishes when she heard a loud crash come from upstairs.

She dashed up the stairs towards the noise, staggering back when she saw Lorelai laying on the ground and Mia crouched down beside her.

"What happened" she called fearfully, fearing her mothers heart had stopped again.

"I don't no we were talking and then she suddenly staggered backwards."

"Heartbeat" Rory asked faintly as she looked away for a second.

Mia reached down and took Lorelai's wrist checking for a pulse, her own hands shaking with fear.

"There's a pulse" she said sighing with relief as she gently shook Lorelai's shoulder.

Mia repeatedly called her name while Rory pondered calling an ambulance. Then movement as Lorelai's eyes slowly flickered open and she saw their pale frightened faces.

After that event both Mia and Rory had taken Lorelai to the hospital leaving William in Babette's care once again.

On examination the doctor explained that the collapse was due to a palpitation probably caused by her medication. He didn't think changing her treatment would be beneficial so he prescribed she rest more and eliminate any unnecessary stress.

Since then Rory had been a nervous wreak and Lorelai had felt terrible for scaring her daughter once more. Rory had wanted to skip Friday night dinner but it was Mia who encouraged her to attend, anxious for her to take a break from the worries of home.

The sound of the doorbell reminded her to paint a smile on her face, careful not to reawaken any of her Grandmas concerns.

"Rory" Emily called happily as she opened the front door.

"Hi Grandma, no maid tonight" she asked as upbeat as she could manage.

"No she was unexpectedly fired earlier today, so is everything okay. I mean we haven't seen you for a while and I can't remember the last time your mother was here."

"Everything's great, I've just been so busy at work. I'm sure Moms busy too what with the Inn and William taking up all her time."

"So your mothers back at work, seems too soon" Emily probed.

"The Dragonfly's been fully booked this week, I'm sure it's only temporary" Rory explained as they walked into the drawing room.

"Rory" Richard cheered standing up from his chair to greet his granddaughter.

"Grandpa, how are you" she asked eagerly.

"Great the doctor says I've never been in better shape. I guess it's down to all the exercise I'm getting or maybe it's all the fish" he said pointedly looking over at his wife.

Emily quickly changed the subject, asking Rory about her new job in Providence.

Providence being a lie Rory had formed to hide the fact that she was unemployed so she could look after her mother.

"The jobs great Grandma" Rory replied but didn't elaborate.

"Good, we're both so proud of you. I'm always talking to my friends about you, my granddaughter the journalist. I'm afraid there fed up with my constant bragging." said Emily happily.

Rory looked down at the carpet as she tried to keep her face in check. She didn't enjoy lying to her grandparents or having to listen to there unjustified praise.

During dinner the conversation drifted over to William and Rory was glad the focus had been turned away from herself.

"How is our little grandson, why we haven't seen him in months. I call your mother constantly hoping for an invite but she's always putting me off" said Emily sadly.

"He's perfect, he just started sitting up but he can't maintain it. It's so sweet when he slips down onto the pillows we lay around him, it surprises him every time" Rory reminisced.

Both Richard and Emily smiled at her recollection as they tried to draw an image of William in their minds eye.

"Oh and he's such a happy baby, always smiling and laughing especially for Mom. I would have loved to bring him with me tonight but it's really too late for him."

"Maybe you could come visit during the day" Emily asked hopefully.

"Sure we'll make a date but it's probably best if it's not next week" Rory replied.

"Why not next week" Richard asked curiously anxious to see William again.

"William's teething at the moment and Mom's the only one he will go to. I just want you to see him at his best."

"Poor little thing" said Emily, disappointment making her sound a little cold.

"Grandma I promise to bring him over soon and I'm sure as soon as things ease up a bit Mom will want to come too."

Emily nodded her head but didn't really hold up much hope that Lorelai would be stopping by anytime soon.

Once Rory had left them that night after a pleasant but surprisingly flat evening Emily walked slowly up to her bedroom.

Richard arrived a little later and was surprised to find that the bedroom was empty. He checked the bathroom, then began checking their many guest rooms hoping to find his missing wife.

He found her sitting on Lorelai's old bed an odd far away look in her eyes. "Emily" he called uncertainly, stepping inside the bedroom where time had stood still.

Emily looked up then quickly turned away a tear slowly trailing down her cheek.

"Emily what's wrong" he asked moved beside her on the bed and taking hold of her hand.

"Something's not right" she answered weakly.

"What's not right?"

"Lorelai, something's not right with Lorelai. We haven't seen her in months, she never calls and Rory never directly discusses her. I think they're hiding something from us."

"I just think you over thinking this. Lorelai's stopped coming to dinner and your scared she's shutting us out of her life again. I think Rory's telling us the truth, Lorelai's busy and with Luke and everything else I think she's earned a little break for awhile."

Emily sighed unconvinced "We don't even know what happened there, one minute they're perfectly happy together and the next he's gone and Lorelai's a single parent again."

"I don't understand what happened myself but I'm sure when Lorelai's ready to tell us she will" said Richard thoughtfully.

"I hate being kept in the dark like this Richard, it's not fair and we don't deserve it."

"Maybe not but I learned a long time ago that when Lorelai doesn't want us to know something then we won't know. We just have to be patient and wait for her to come to us Emily."

Emily stood up abruptly at Richards words, shaking her head obstinately. "I've been patient long enough, I want answers. I'm tired of waiting for Lorelai to come to us because she won't she never has. That's it I'm going over there tomorrow invite or no invite and I'm not leaving until I get some honesty."

With that Emily marched away ignoring her husbands attempts to pacify her and his certainty that going to Lorelai was not a good idea.


	13. Chapter 13

Emily drove up to Lorelai's house in the early hours, impatient for the answers to her questions. She noticed Rory's car in the driveway and a black car she didn't recognise behind Lorelai's Jeep.

Reasoning that a friend of Rory's was visiting she proceeded up the path and knocked loudly on the front door. She was stood there waiting, remembering there was a baby in the house and wishing she hadn't been quite so loud when the door softly opened.

She gasped when she saw her standing on the other side of the door her grandson happily resting in her arms.

"Emily" she announced completely stunned by her arrival.

Emily stared unable to respond, shocked to see her in Lorelai's house. "Mia, what a surprise" she finally managed.

Mia looked around uncertainly then remembering her manners finally invited Emily into the house.

"Can I get you anything to drink" she asked as she placed William into his bouncer.

"No thank you" she replied stiffly, her eyes drifting to her grandson happily kicking his legs as he bounced.

"I'm afraid you just missed the girls they went out shopping for the day. They've been so busy lately I thought they needed some time together so I offered to babysit."

"So your back living in Stars Hollow" Emily asked, trying to hide her disappointment that Lorelai wasn't home.

"No just a holiday, my son John lives in Connecticut and after I visited with him and his family I stopped by to see Lorelai. I haven't seen her since the wedding and I couldn't wait to meet little William."

Mia smiled at William as she spoke while Emily sat down beside him. "He's a lot bigger than the last time I saw him" she said thoughtfully.

"He's a good little eater, takes after the girls" Mia replied proudly as she joined Emily on the floor.

As Mia reached eye line with William he immediately gave her a beaming smile which she reciprocated.

"How long have you been in town" asked Emily, noticing the connection between her and her grandson. "Not long" was all the information she supplied as she watched William thoughtfully.

* * *

Meanwhile upstairs in her bedroom Lorelai was fast asleep and completely oblivious to her mothers presence. Rory on the other hand was not and was listening intently to the conversation going on below her.

She had been sleeping beside her mother until a loud bang had startled her awake. Rory slipped out of bed and peered through the window, shocked when she saw her grandmothers car in the driveway.

Dashing towards the landing she called softly to Mia, "It's Grandma, please tell her we're out. I don't to upset Mom."

Mia looked up the stairs and nodded as she went to open the door and Rory quietly slipped away.

* * *

"Hello William, I'm your Grandma do you remember me" Emily cooed as she held William in her arms. The baby watched her face intently, then looked around the room searchingly.

When he didn't find what he was looking for he started to whimper, a few tears falling down his cheek.

"Oh dear" Emily said sadly as she began to bounce him hoping to stop the tears.

"Don't worry he's just a bit cranky right now, I expect he's looking for Lorelai. I guess teething must be awful, poor little guy" said Mia.

Emily stood up with him and walked around the room gently rocking him the whole time. "Poor baby, do you miss your Mommy" she said softly. William continued to gaze at her face sobbing occasionally until he finally managed to stop.

"There that's better, we just need to get reacquainted" Emily said happily.

Bouncing the baby she noticed something on the mantle place that caught her eye. It was a bottle of pills, stepping closer she saw they were clearly marked for Lorelai Gilmore.

Wanting to get a better look she diverted Mia's attention by taking her up on the offer of a drink. Leaving her alone to make the drinks, Emily moved swiftly over to the bottle and picked it up.

Reading the bottle repeatedly, Emily tried to commit the words to memory. All the time holding William tightly in her arms and keeping the pills away from his reaching hands.

Shortly after Mia's return Emily made an excuse that Richard had called and needed her. She kissed William goodbye and asked Mia to tell the girls she would call later.

Mia looked on confused but equally relived that Emily was leaving as she took William from her arms.

Once she was back in her car she tipped the contents of her purse out onto the passenger seat looking for a pen. Then she opened the glove compartment and pulled out her user manual, hastily scribbling down the name of the pills before she could forget.

"Richard" she shouted on entering her house, the user manual clutched tightly in her hand.

"Richard" she called again waiting for him to appear from his study. "Emily, your back early" he announced as he walked into the hallway.

"Something is wrong Richard. They weren't home went I arrived but you'll never guess who was there, looking after William."

"Who" Richard asked playing along.

"Mia, and from what I could see she's been there a while. William knew her and she certainly knew her way around the place. I also think she was lying to me when she said the girls were out, both their cars were in the driveway."

"Emily I think your being paranoid, maybe they just got a lift with a friend or something."

"There's more, I found a bottle of pills on the mantle piece. They were Lorelai's."

"Emily please stop looking for trouble and stop snooping around in our daughters life. If they're was something to tell don't you think she would have told us."

"She wouldn't and she didn't" said Emily sadly as she slumped down into a chair.

"Emily" Richard asked softly seeing the change in his wife and stooping down beside her.

"I talked to Joshua on my way home, I wanted to ask him about the pills." said Emily suddenly.

"You called Joshua" Richard asked a little stunned.

"He said they were beta blockers Richard. Lorelai's taking medication for a heart condition."

Richard grew pale, who knew all about beta blockers he was talking them himself.

"Maybe he's mistaken" he said standing up and turning away.

"Richard it's not a mistake. I was doubtful myself, I made check with a colleague. I think she's sick Richard. I think our daughters sick and she didn't want us to know."


	14. Chapter 14

Richard drove down the highway in a state of sorrow, Emily's words still echoing in his mind.

"I think she's sick Richard. I think our daughters sick and she didn't want us to know."

Richard had stormed out of the house moments after this statement, driven away by his own fears.

His daughter the brightest girl in her class, a mother at sixteen. Runaway, chatterbox, a constant mystery to him, was it true was she really sick.

His beautiful devoted little girl, the best mother he had ever known. He pulled over quickly to the side of the road tears blurring his vision.

He took a few steadying breaths, wiped his eyes then continued his journey. He was going to her, he needed to know what had happened to her.

Parking his car down the road he dashed up to the house hoping to take them by surprise. He noticed the front door slightly ajar so he pushed it open and stepped quietly inside.

The house was eerily calm as he walked towards the living room. Then he noticed someone stretched out on the sofa. "Lorelai" he asked softly, looking down he knew she was asleep her left arm was hanging over the side of the sofa.

He reached down and hovered over her limp hand, wanting to take hold of it but fearful at the same time.

He noticed how pale her skin was and how skinny she seemed beneath the thin blanket. Richard looked away disturbed by her altered looks, his eyes falling on his granddaughter.

"Rory" he called as he followed her into the kitchen. Rory looked up her eyes full of alarm, her body shaking slightly as he approached.

"Rory what's going on" he demanded a little too severely.

Rory's lip trembled as she stared at the imposing figure of her grandfather, unable to answer him.

"Rory" he asked more gently. Rory still didn't reply her eyes shifting around like a cornered animal.

"RORY WHAT IS GOING ON" he shouted finally loosing the little restraint he had left.

"Nothing" she finally answered, so softly that he almost missed it. "NOTHING" he shouted again his face changing colour.

"Grandpa please I can't tell you" she stuttered, frightened for the first time by his temper.

"TELL ME WHAT" he shouted again. "Grandpa please try to calm down, it isn't good for you to get so worked up."

"RORY TELL ME" he yelled moving closer towards her, his face crimson.

"STOP" Lorelai cried out, suddenly appearing at the door. "Dad stop, your upsetting my daughter."

Lorelai reached for Rory's hand and pulled her behind her protectively. "Please Dad try to calm down." She turned to Rory her hand still clinging tightly to hers "Sweetheart can you give us a minute."

Rory shook her head as she pulled on her mothers hand trying to lead her away. "It's okay, everything's okay" said Lorelai reaching down and kissing Rory's cheek.

"I'm not leaving" said Rory determinedly. "Please just for a minute" Lorelai asked again her eyes sparkling with conviction.

Reluctantly Rory walked away determined not to add to her mothers stress, but certain she would be back soon.

"Want to tell me why your shouting at my daughter" Lorelai asked coldly looking back to her father.

"I wanted to know" he replied sitting down on one of the chairs, his temper calming the moment she stepped into the room.

"Know what."

"Know what's wrong and don't you dare tell me it's nothing."

"Dad I don't understand what your talking about."

"Do I look like a fool to you, DO I" Richard shouted his temper returning.

"No Dad" Lorelai replied, pulling out the furthest chair from him and sitting down.

"Why are you taking beta blockers, what's wrong" he said as calmly as he could.

"Beta blockers?" she questioned evasively.

"Your mother saw the bottle earlier today."

"Mom was here, in the house" she asked surprised.

"Yes your mother was here, she's worried sick about you. Why have you been keeping this from us, lying to your family, Lorelai why."

Lorelai was quite knowing her secret had finally been discovered. It would all come out now and the reasons behind her silence.

"I guess I was scared about your reactions. I disappoint you constantly and I didn't want to feel your shame again. We're very different people Dad, I needed some support, love even. I didn't think I'd get that from either of you."

"Lorelai don't you know that we love you" Richard asked sadly.

"I know Dad, I do. You just don't show me the kind of love I need. You do with Rory and with William so I know you can, you just can't with me. It's normal I guess, I know I caused you a lot of pain in the past. I just wish our relationship was different sometimes and when I need you I wish I could run to you, but I can't."

"You can sweetheart, you can" Richard moaned, his head falling onto the table with a thud.

"I'm sorry Dad, I'm sorry I couldn't be what you wanted."

"Your perfect just the way you are, I just wish I'd seen it sooner" Richard mumbled into the table.

Lorelai moved her chair closer, hesitantly stretching her arm around her fathers shoulders.

He looked up at her face sighing at her touch, "I'm sorry too, I'm sorry you couldn't come to us. Now please tell me what's going on Lorelai."

"I want to tell you both together. I don't want to go through this twice, it's too hard."

"Okay, I'll call your mother and send her round" Richard replied, reaching inside his pocket for his phone.

"Now" Lorelai stated suddenly.

"Yes now Lorelai, it's time."

As Richard talked on his phone Lorelai went out to talk to Rory. "Rory I want you to go out for a while. Catch up with Lane of something."

"Why" Rory asked apprehensively.

"Your Grandma is coming over and I'm going to tell them. We need to be alone, I don't want you getting you upset when they find out."

"I'm not going anywhere, are you crazy. They'll only upset you and make you unwell you could get dizzy and collapse or worse. Please I have to stay here, you need me. I can tell them to leave if it gets too much, they'll listen to me."

"Rory please, I don't want you to hear this again and it will be easier for me if I'm alone. I don't want to upset you believe me but I can't tell them if your here, I just can't."

Rory looked at the tears forming in her mothers eyes and sighed "Fine, fifteen minutes and I'm coming back."

"Fifteen minutes" Lorelai agreed smiling at Rory as she walked away.


	15. Chapter 15

The second Emily arrived, Rory excused herself but not before begging her grandparents to go easy on her mother.

"Why don't we sit in the living room" said Lorelai nervously once Rory had left. Both Emily and Richard seated themselves on the sofa while Lorelai sat apart in an armchair.

"I just talked to Dad and I tried to explain why I didn't tell you both straight away. I hope he understands. Did Dad tell you much over the phone."

"He tried to explain your thought process" Emily replied making it clear she hadn't reached the same understanding as her husband.

"Okay well I guess I'll get straight to the point" said Lorelai falling over her words.

"I have a condition called peripartum cardiomyopathy, I first found out about it when I was pregnant with William."

"Oh Lorelai" Emily exclaimed, upset it had taken so long for them to find out.

"I didn't have the easiest pregnancy after the diagnosis. I was hospitalised in my third trimester and had to stay for the rest of the pregnancy."

"The holiday" Emily asked angrily.

"A lie. I'm sorry, I should have told you then but I was so scared about William. Dad had just gotten out of the hospital himself and I didn't want to add your stress."

Richard looked alarmed to learn that his own health had been a contributory factor in Lorelai's concealment. He took a deep steadying breath and eventually managed to ask more about her condition.

"I have heart damage, most likely caused by my pregnancy. As a result my heart muscle has become weak and cannot pump my blood as well. We're hoping the heart muscle will improve in time and the medication helps strengthen my heart's pumping ability."

Emily was white as a sheet once Lorelai had finished talking, Richard was holding tightly to her hand his face unreadable.

"I know it's all a lot to take in. I have some literature about the condition if it would help" said Lorelai concerned by the look on her parents faces.

"Yes, maybe we could take a look a little later" Richard replied softy. He looked over at his wife and she nodded absently in his direction.

"Lorelai, I want you to tell us something else" said Richard thoughtfully. "Anything" Lorelai replied as she looked over at her father.

"Why did Luke leave. I mean how could he after everything that's happened. I just don't understand how he could leave you and his son."

"Something happened about a month ago, something bad and it changed him."

"What happened" they asked in unison.

"I was at home with William, I needed something upstairs so I left him in his bouncer.

Once I reached the bedroom the whole room was spinning, I was clammy and couldn't catch my breath. The next thing I knew I was on the floor, I could hear William crying so I tried to get up then nothing. The rest I learned later from Luke and my neighbour Babette."

"What, learned what" Emily shouted alarmed.

"Luke came home, he found me on the floor of our bedroom, I wasn't breathing anymore. He had to resuscitate me for over fifteen minutes. Babette told me how hard he worked to bring me back. It's hard to imagine what he went through that day, eventually the paramedics shocked my heart and it started to beat again."

Both Richard and Emily were silent as they processed what had happened to their daughter. Shocked by the knowledge but equally devastated that they were only finding out about it now.

"Luke saved my life that day, without him I could had died or be left with serious brain damage. He saved my life and I ruined his, he was never the same after that.

It was a difficult time for us, I was in the hospital, Luke was damaged and Rory was all alone. She wouldn't tell her friends about my illness and she stopped confiding in me. I scared her that day, she told me later it was the worst day of her life."

"Why Lorelai, why didn't you call us then. We could have helped you, we could have been there for Rory."

"I don't know, I was afraid scared to death."

"Sweetheart we'd do anything for you why can't you see that" said Richard.

"I'm sorry" Lorelai said softly.

"I'm sorry too, sorry that you can't tell us when something is wrong. What would have happened Lorelai, what would we do, you almost died" Emily stuttered.

"I think what your mothers trying to say is we need to know, we need to know and you need to be honest with us. From now on we need to know, know everything."

Lorelai nodded her head then asked "What do you need to know Dad."

"How are you" he asked as he nervously reached for her hand. "I'm okay" she replied unconvincingly.

"Lorelai we need to know and you need to be honest remember" her father reproached. "Its a struggle at times to do the things I used to take for granted, but I get there in the end. Rory helps and Mia and it's surprising how big a motivator William can be."

"There's more, your skins so pale and you were fast asleep when I arrived."

"I get tired easily and the constant exhaustion alters my looks I guess. I can get dizzy and occasionally I will pass out." she confessed.

"You've collapsed more than once" Emily exclaimed.

"No not like with Luke. When I stopped breathing I had a cardiac arrhythmia, it's pretty rare and hasn't happened since. The fainting is caused by palpitations caused by my medication. It's not serious just upsetting for those who get to witness it."

"Has Rory witnessed it" asked Emily, Lorelai sighed as she slowly nodded her head.

"What's going to happen Lorelai" her father asked cryptically.

"My doctors are still waiting, hoping my heart will recover. But if there isn't an improvement soon then my prognosis is a lot more uncertain."

"Uncertain, how are you feeling in yourself" asked Richard.

"I think a lot and worry constantly about my children. I'm scared what would happen to them if I died."

"What, you never said anything about dying. Lorelai that is not happening do you hear me, in fact I forbid it" said Emily passionately. Lorelai secretly smiled at her mothers words, almost believing that Emily's adamant prohibition could prevent her death.

"I'm sorry to lay this on you in one fell swoop, I've had time to adjust and it still terrifies me. But I promise you Mom I have no plans on going anywhere" Lorelai smiled.

"Really Lorelai smiling seems inappropriate at a time like this" Emily scolded, her fear making her seem unsympathetic.

"I'm sorry" Lorelai replied her smile quickly vanishing from her face. Richard looked over at her, saddened by the loss of her contagious smile.

"Sweetheart I want to see you smile, don't you listen to your mother" he said gently.

Lorelai immediately smiled at Richard unable to stop herself, it was the first time in her life she'd felt a genuine connection to him.

Emily sighed at the interaction between them, secretly jealous that she couldn't bond with her daughter too.

"I think it's time we left" she announced, suddenly standing up and walking towards the door.

"Mom wait" Lorelai called chasing her onto the porch. "Mom won't you stay to see Rory and Mia will be back soon with William, they went shopping."

"Shopping again, my how you love to shop in this house. I'm sorry but I want to go home it's been a difficult day and I'm tired."

Emily was walking towards her car when Lorelai suddenly reached out and grabbed her arm. "Mom please don't walk away, I'm sorry..." Lorelai began but was quickly cut off by Emily. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'M SORRY. IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY" Emily screamed, bracing herself against the car.

Lorelai was quiet as she listened to her mothers rant, only mildly aware that her heart beat was racing and her vision blurred.

Mid rant Emily felt Lorelai bump against her side, she looked around annoyed then panicked as her daughter slumped towards the ground.

Emily was with her in a heartbeat slowing her decent, then she screamed out for her husband.

"Lorelai, Lorelai I'm sorry too" she said urgently as she leaned over her only child.


	16. Chapter 16

Richard dashed outside and ran towards Emily, shocked to see his daughter prostrate on the ground.

"What did you do" he shouted on his approach. Emily was silent as she felt for a pulse, her mind playing back to all the possibilities they had just discussed.

"Should we call an ambulance" Richard asked pacing around in a panic.

Emily didn't answer she was too busy giving thanks that Lorelai had a pulse. Slowly she started to stir, her chest heaving out a laboured breath.

"Lorelai, Lorelai can you hear me" Emily yelled shaking her shoulder with urgency.

Lorelai moved her head to the side and sighed as she realised what had happened.

"LORELAI" Emily yelled again, panicking at her daughters silence. Lorelai's eyes snapped open startled by her mothers frightened voice.

"I'm okay" she said weakly, moving her body and trying to sit up. As she became vertical her focus suddenly blurred again and she slumped back to the ground.

"Lorelai, stay still" Emily commanded. "I don't think you should sit up yet. How do you feel" Richard asked a little more calmly than his wife.

Lorelai felt incredibly weak but she wasn't sure how well her parents would react to the news. She tried to play it down but her vision was still fuzzy and she was becoming disorientated.

"Sweetheart" Richard asked again when he noticed her eyes had closed. Lorelai didn't respond she was feeling faint again and was worried she was going to loose consciousness.

"Richard call an ambulance, something isn't right" she heard her mother say before once again the darkness swallowed her.

She woke to the sounds of raised voices and a bright light being shined in her eyes.

"Miss Gilmore, Miss Gilmore can you hear me" someone close by was calling. With effort Lorelai managed to open her eyes and glance round at her surroundings.

She was in a vehicle and two paramedics were standing above her looking down. "What happened" she asked uncertainly.

"You collapsed, your father called an ambulance. How are you feeling, any chest pain."

Lorelai shook her head but promptly stopped when the two paramedics swam out of focus. "I'm dizzy still" she said as her hand moved up to her forehead. One of the men placed a finger in her line of vision and asked her to follow it. She tired but her focus was off causing her to sink back onto the stretcher and close her eyes.

"Okay, I'm concerned about the vertigo. I think you'd benefit from a trip to hospital" one of the paramedics explained.

"No, I'm fine" said Lorelai shooting out of the stretcher. She made it as far as the second paramedic before she collapsed once again.

"Get a move on, go tell them we're going to the hospital, she's pretty unstable." one paramedic said to the other.

He jumped out of the vehicle and found a small group of people outside, several shouting at one another. "We're taking Miss Gilmore to the hospital. I'm afraid we haven't had much luck stabilising her condition." he said as he walked towards the drivers seat. "Can we go with her" Emily asked uncertainly.

"No I'm going with her" shouted Rory who had arrived just before the ambulance appeared.

"There're only room for one."

"Rory walked over and opened the door quickly steeping inside before Emily could even react. "We'll meet you there" Richard shouted as the ambulance pulled away.

"Emily quick get in the car" Richard yelled, rushing over to the drivers side. He was just about to reverse the vehicle when he saw a car pull in behind him.

Mia stepped out cautiously noticing their strained faces, concerned they hadn't taken Lorelai's news well.

"Is everything all right" she asked. "Can you move your car out of my way" Richard asked rather severely.

"Sure" Mia replied meekly, stepping back inside her car. "Wait don't you want to see William before you go" she asked, oblivious to what had just happened.

"Please just move the car, we need to get to the hospital" Richard asked again.

"Hospital" Mia repeated as her eyes darted towards the house, "Is it Lorelai."

Richard nodded desperately, his hands shaking slightly by his side. "Get in my car, I'm driving" said Mia taking charge.

Richard looked at Emily then back at Mia clearly torn, "Come on, you really shouldn't be driving."

Richard nodded in agreement walking over to passenger side and opening the door for his wife. "I'll sit in the backseat" Emily said softly, faintly smiling at William as she got inside. Mia then pulled on her seatbelt and slowly pulled away. Her thoughts on Lorelai and making sure her parents got to her in one piece.


	17. Chapter 17

"Rory" Richard shouted as he noticed his granddaughter sitting alone in the waiting room. She turned at his voice and quickly walked towards him, her face still damp from tears.

"What's happening" he asked uncertainly.

"They think it was another arrhythmia, possibly brought on by stress" said Rory, putting emphasis on the word stress.

Emily looked down at her feet guiltily, while Richard sighed and bowed his head. "Have you seen her" Emily asked softly.

"No, not since the ambulance. They said they wanted her to be more stable before they allowed visitors."

"What's that suppose to mean" shouted Emily, her panicked eyes turning towards Richard.

"It means she's sick and you don't get to shout and cause a scene. This wouldn't even be happening if it wasn't for you" Rory shouted back.

Emily opened her mouth to defend herself but was stopped by a look from her husband.

"Rory please, don't shout at you Grandma. We're all upset but shouting isn't going to help, sit back down and we can all wait together."

"Can I hold William" Rory asked as she sat back down. Mia handed him over and sat down beside her, Richard sitting down on her other side.

Rory held William close her face resting on the top of his head, the fresh baby scent soothing her jagged nerves.

William smiled happily at his big sister, but occasionally he would look around at the other faces searchingly. Rory watched him and broke down again, knowing who he was looking for.

"Oh, sweetheart" said Mia as she handed Rory a tissue. "It's okay, it's okay" she repeated as Rory leaned into her open arms.

Emily looked up at Rory sadly, desperate to be the one to console her as Richard squeezed her hand sympathetically.

They waiting in silence once Rory had calmed down, William snuggling down and eventually falling asleep in his sisters arms.

* * *

"Luke" Lorelai whispered into her pillow as she came round. "Luke" she called again as her eyes adjusted to her gloomy hospital room.

She felt someone laying beside her, their arms wrapped tight around her waist. "Luke" she asked uncertainly into the darkness.

"I'm here" he said gently, Lorelai gasped at the sound of his voice. She moved to the edge of the bed in surprise but he didn't let her go. Luke held on pulling her closer and sighing with satisfaction when her hair brushed against his face.

"I'm here, I'll always be here" he repeated as his hand caressed her face. Luke moved closer, his lips tantalising close to hers when suddenly Lorelai moved away.

"No, you weren't here. You left" she said sadly. "I didn't leave you Lorelai, I couldn't not ever."

"You did" Lorelai sobbed. Suddenly Luke grabbed hold of her hand and pushed it against his chest. "Can you feel that" he asked gently, "It's beating for you, just you."

"Luke" Lorelai gasped as the steady beat of his heart pounded against her palm.

"Just you" he said again as he moved her hand to his mouth and lightly kissed each finger.

"Oh Luke" Lorelai called once again, "I missed you." Luke reached for her other hand and gradually pulled her into his embrace. Lorelai followed allowing herself to sink into his arms, she could smell him, feel him. She felt safe and loved and finally at peace.

Sadly her peace came to an abrupt end when she felt someone shake her awake. "Lorelai" someone called as she shifted in the bed. She opened her eyes and slowly noticed a man standing beside her bed.

"Luke" she asked hopefully.

"I'm your doctor Lorelai, I was here when they brought you in. How are you feeling?" he asked.

Lorelai thought about the question unsure how to answer. She was back in her daily nightmare and the dream she had just woken from was just that, a dream.

"I'm fine, I guess" she reluctantly replied, "What happened."

"I believe you had another arrhythmia, your heart rate was certainly erratic on your arrival. You were fortunate that you weren't alone this time when it happened. I understand that your father called the paramedics quite quickly after your collapse and they were able to shock your heart back into a normal rhythm."

"When can I go home" asked Lorelai flatly, uninterested by her second encounter with death.

"Not today, you need to be observed for a few days. I'm sorry but after your second cardiac event in less than a month we may need to think about surgery" he said thoughtfully.

"Surgery" Lorelai questioned.

"Yes, a pace maker may help prevent your heart from stopping again in the future. It will only be a temporary fix though as your heart muscle is still incredibly weak."

"Will it get stronger" Lorelai asked.

"The medication hasn't helped so far but different drugs may improve function. I want to change your meds and monitor your progress for the time being."

"You've done that before, what if I need a transplant. What if..." Lorelai broke off.

"Transplant surgery is a long way off, your not there yet. Please try not to upset yourself will possibilities that may never happen."

Lorelai looked up as he spoke surprised, "Possibilities are all I have" she said.

He tried to be sympathetic but failed in Lorelai's eyes as he began his exam. He listened to her chest and made notes in his chart. Then he checked on her blood pressure and pulse.

"Okay, I want you to rest now. Your pressure is still low so I want you to stay flat on the bed. No sitting up and no getting out of bed, do you understand."

Lorelai just nodded, annoyed at being treated like a child. He made some more notes then left closing the door softly behind him.

"Why me" Lorelai muttered to herself as she relaxed back onto the mattress. "Why me."


	18. Chapter 18

It was three days after her admittance to the hospital and Lorelai was getting antsy.

"Can I go home yet" she asked her doctor one morning as he listened to her chest.

"Soon, your blood pressure is still very low. I want that to stabilise first and then we can talk about discharge. Any side effects from the new medication?" he asked.

"I'm tired I guess, but I was before so it's probably nothing" Lorelai replied.

"Anything else" he probed as he pulled up a chair and sat down next to the bed.

"Nothing, I just want to go home. I miss my baby so much, he can't stay for too long and when he's here he's not himself."

"Understandable" said the doctor sympathetically, "I promise you will go home soon."

Lorelai smiled at his promise prompting her doctor to join in, her smiles were contagious.

"I'll be back later to check on you, make sure you didn't make a break for it" he joked.

"I'll be here" she replied reluctantly as he left the room, the smile quickly disappearing from her face.

Since arriving at the hospital Mia had become William's full time carer, helping out as much as possible and bringing him to see his mother often. Rory only ever left the hospital to sleep or eat and even her parents had become a constant presence in her room.

Her relationship with them had improved a little over the last few days and Rory was slowly coming to terms with the possibility, that Emily was not responsible for her mothers condition.

Though difficult at times and often strained they all tried hard to make an effort to get along, especially for their daughters sake.

A knock at the door brought Lorelai out of her reverie as she looked up and called to them to come in.

Emily slowly walked inside, her purse held tightly in her hands as she anxiously looked over at Lorelai. "I saw the doctor leaving, is everything all right" she asked.

"Everything's fine" she replied apprehensively, attempting to brush off Emily's concerns.

"What did he say" Emily asked unconvinced that everything was okay with her daughter.

Lorelai paused as she thought over her earlier conversation, then ultimately explained what he had said. "He wants me to stay for a bit longer" she exclaimed.

"Why" Emily asked nervously. "My blood pressure is low and he wants to monitor it. It's not a big deal I'm just disappointed" said Lorelai sadly.

"Lorelai I understand that you want to go home, but really your in the best place. Mia can bring William to visit and you'll be home soon."

Lorelai looked surprised by Emily's words, amazed that her mother was finally giving her some comfort. She leaned her head back on the pillow and smiled up at her mother. "I'm sorry Mom" she said after a short pause in the conversation.

"Sorry for what?" Emily asked as she sat down on the side of the bed.

"Sorry I didn't tell you. I should have, I know that now" Lorelai explained.

"I talked to your father and he told me what you told him. I may not fully understand your motives but I can't blame you, not now anyway."

"Because I'm in the hospital" Lorelai asked.

"Because your sick and have been for a while it seems. Don't worry you'll never hear the end of it when your better" Emily said smiling.

"Better" Lorelai repeated wistfully.

"Yes better, which is going to happen. Just you wait and see." Emily said confidently as she reached down and patted her daughters hand.

Elsewhere a scruffy and dishevelled man was unlocking the door to Luke's Diner. The windows were boarded up and a mountain of mail was growing on floor where it had gathered. He pushed hard forcing the door open then slowly stepped inside.

The man walked up the stairs to access the small apartment above, his movements slow and weary.

As he entered he noticed a thin layer of dust covering everything and a musty smell throughout.

Then he saw it, a light blue sweatshirt that was not his own. He picked it up and pressed it against his face, breathing in the light scent and sighing.

Then he saw her face smiling back at him from a framed photograph beside his bed. Running from it and into the bathroom he though he was safe until he glimpsed the various toiletries she had left behind.

He couldn't stand it, she was everywhere. Everything around him evoked a memory of her. Every memory make it harder and harder for him to breathe. Finally he sank down to the ground as he let out a howl of despair.

Lorelai was everywhere and yet she was gone, gone to him. The agony of that realisation broke him and he wept. She was everywhere, in everything but he had lost her.

Lost because he had walked away.


	19. Chapter 19

Rory was sitting in her usual chair beside her mothers bed reading a book. Mia had just left with William and Lorelai exhausted by the visit was now fast asleep.

Rory looked up as Emily slowly crept inside the room with Richard flanking beside her.

"Hi" Rory whispered to her grandparents, standing up to embrace them. "Is everything all right" Emily asked uncertainly, her eyes drifting towards Lorelai.

"Everything's fine, Mom's just a little worn out after Williams visit. He was really clingy today and cried his eyes out when they left."

"Poor little chap" Richard replied sadly. "Mom was pretty upset too, she hates it when he gets in such a state."

"Was she okay" Emily asked as she unknowingly moved closer to her daughter.

"Mia called from the car to say he had settled down and that helped, then she fell asleep."

Emily looked at Lorelai scrutinising his face, she could see the track marks from her tears and a slight redness to her cheeks. "Has the doctor been by" she asked still unconvinced that everything was fine.

"Grandma she's fine, just tired. This is what it's like, she has to rest a lot" said Rory.

Lorelai shifted in the bed which caused them all to turn their focus back to her.

"Maybe we should go out into the hall, we're disturbing her" said Richard.

"You go, I can't leave her" said Rory determinedly.

"Rory, you said everything was okay. Of course you can leave" Richard replied.

"I know but I still can't leave. She may wake up, she may need me."

Emily looked over at Richard uncertainly, "How about I stay. You go get something to eat with your Grandpa."

"I'm fine Grandma" Rory announced.

"Please Rory, let me stay with your mother. I need to be here too" Emily said sadly.

Rory relented once she saw her grandmothers expression, "Okay, we'll be back soon."

Emily smiled and waved them off as she sat in the chair Rory had vacated. She looked at her daughter thoughtfully, troubled that she hadn't realised it before. Her daughter was sick she knew that but she hadn't realised just how unhappy she was until now.

* * *

Back in Stars Hollow and Mia was pushing William in his stroller along the street. She noticed the boards had been removed from the windows of the diner and crossed the street to take a closer look.

As she got closer she saw someone moving around inside and grew suspicious. He was quite dishevelled in appearance, his hair wild and untamed and a growth of stubble covered his face.

Mia thinking someone had broken in and without much forethought knocked forcefully on the window.

He looked up immediately, his face sunken with eyes unbearably sad. Mia was struck by his familiarity but couldn't place him at first as he stared back at her.

"Luke" she questioned suddenly. "Luke is that you" she called again. Utterly shocked by the changes brought about since his absence.

The figure slowly walked towards the door, opening it then walked back towards a chair. Mia marched inside carrying William with her and leaving his stroller outside.

He looked up as she stood over him and finally noticed the presence of his son.

Luke smiled at the baby surprised how strange the action felt, like he was out of practice.

"He's grown so much" he muttered under his breath. "I've missed him" he added.

"Do you want to hold him" Mia offered as she sat beside him.

"Can I" he asked almost excitedly as he reached for little boy.

William scrutinised his face uncertainly as Luke held him tightly in his arms. Tears soon falling from his eyes as he leaned over and reverently kissed the top of William's head.

"I'm sorry baby, I'm so sorry I left" he sobbed. William continued to stare, then in an effort to cheer the stranger he pointed a chubby finger and babbled "Ma, ma, ma."

Luke exhaled at the sound of his voice, instantly understanding the meaning behind the sounds.

He looked back at the door almost expecting to see her walk inside too. Emotion overwhelmed him as William stared back, a look of confusion on his baby face.

He saw her eyes reflected back at him and suddenly had to pass him back to Mia.

"I'm sorry, I can't do this" he stuttered as he jumped up from his chair.

"Luke you have to do this. This is your son" Mia admonished, holding the baby out towards his face.

"I can't bare to look at him, all I can see is her" he admitted as he bowed his head.

"Your in there too, he's a part of you and Lorelai."

"Don't, please. Don't say her name" begged Luke.

"Why" Mia questioned.

"Just don't. Please not yet I can't."

"Why, why can't you hear her name. She's done nothing wrong."

"Of course not, I just hate to be reminded. I never deserved her and she always deserved better."

"Luke regardless of who it the better person, she loves you. That hasn't changed."

"Loved me" he said sadly.

"Loves you, always loves" said Mia.

Luke looked up conflicted by her words. "Nobody could love me after what I've done."

"Maybe most would stop but not Lorelai. She's always been able to love without reason." Mia explained.

"Then she's crazy" Luke mumbled.

"Probably but when it comes to love there isn't reason. Lorelai loves you regardless, I just wish you loved her that way."

"I do" Luke replied softly, "I do."


	20. Chapter 20

"Luke" Lorelai gasped as he neared her hospital bed. She reached out towards him, her arms stretched wide. "Luke" she called again as he brushed a hand across her fingers tentatively.

Lorelai fell back towards the pillow her heart racing at his touch. "Don't leave me" she sobbed as he appeared to walk away.

"Luke" she screamed her arms held outwards almost begging, but he was gone.

Lorelai rolled onto her back calling his name repeatedly until she saw Emily emerge at the door. "Lorelai wake up" she called severely, her hand shaking Lorelai's shoulder. "Wake up."

Lorelai jumped awake her heart still racing and her mother leaning over her with a concerned expression.

"Lorelai are you all right" she asked softly, her voice sounding oddly compassionate.

Lorelai just stared, still caught up by another strange dream about Luke. She exhaled slowly then finally admitted to her mother that she was fine.

Emily nodded as she leaned onto the bed, holding out a shaky hand towards her daughter.

Lorelai looked down surprised but quickly grabbed hold and squeezed it gently, "Really Mom I'm fine" she repeated.

"You were calling out his name, I could hear you out in the corridor" said Emily.

"Whose name" Lorelai asked warily. "Lorelai you were calling out for that diner owner, don't you remember."

"No" Lorelai lied, closing her eyes to prevent her mother from reading her expression.

"Lorelai" Emily called uncertainly, afraid her daughter was feeling unwell again.

"I'm really tired Mom" Lorelai muttered. "Are you sure your feeling okay, you look a little pale" Emily enquired.

"Just tired" Lorelai replied as she gave Emily an exhausted smile. "Okay, well try to get some rest. I'll be here when you wake."

"Mom really you don't have to stay, I'll be all right."

"Of course you will but I'm staying regardless Lorelai. I need to stay." Emily said softly unaware that her daughter was already asleep.

* * *

"Do you think she'd see me" Luke asked Mia tentatively. "I mean, do you think I could see her."

"No Luke" Mia said sadly. "I don't think seeing you like this would help her. Have you looked at yourself lately, your a mess."

Luke looked down at his dirty clothes, he brushed his fingers across his face and realised for the first time that he had quite an impressive beard. He sighed and sank back down on his chair. "Your right I am a mess" he muttered "inside and out."

Mia slowly walked towards him and cautiously placed her hand on his shoulder. "Luke I've known you along time, since you were a little boy. I know your habit of distancing yourself from pain. You did it when you lost your mother and then the loss of your father cut you off from everything. She brought you back, made you whole again. Then she got sick and everything fell apart for you again. But you forgot something in your despair Luke."

"What?" Luke asked.

"Lorelai isn't dead" Mia suddenly exclaimed.

Luke flinched at the change in her voice and turned his head to face her. "Luke sweetheart Lorelia's not dead. She hasn't gone like you parents and she needs you."

"She needs better" he replied.

"Maybe she does especially if you don't snap out of this and be the man you've always been."

"The man I've always been" Luke questioned.

"The man she believes in, the man who always come through no matter what" said Mia."

Luke swallowed hard as Mia's words started to sink in. He bounced up from the chair, knocking it on it's side in his haste.

"Your right" he announced. "I'm cleaning myself up then I'm going over to see her."

"You can't" Mia whispered.

"Why, isn't she home" he asked thoughtfully.

"Luke, Lorelai's in the hospital. I thought you knew, I thought that was why your here."

"She's in the hospital" he muttered to himself. "Where, which one" he shouted as he paced across the floor.

"Luke, Luke" Mia shouted as Luke raced to the door. "Luke, come back" she called but he was gone in an instant.


	21. Chapter 21

Lorelai was awoken by the sounds of angry voices outside in the corridor. She lifted her head from the pillow to hear to them more clearly, surprised when she heard her own mothers voice.

"How dare you come here, especially now" Emily screeched. "This is the last thing she needs, your just going to make her worse."

Lorelai let out a shocked gasp, knowing instantly who it was that her mother was screaming at. He had come, he was here and her mother was certainly not about to let him inside to see her.

"Please Emily, I have to see her. I need to tell her something, I need to tell her that I'm sorry" Luke begged.

"GO" Emily shouted. "I'll call security and have you thrown out. You have no right to be here, you lost whatever right you had when you walked away."

"I'm going nowhere Mrs Gilmore, I'll never leave her again" he said softly.

Lorelai pressed her ear to the door to catch his last words and smiled thoughtfully to herself.

The voices continued to rise and fall outside as Lorelai slowly moved to open the door. She was lightheaded as her eyes caught sight of him, his head bowed in defeat as Emily continued to berate him.

He looked so dreadful she had trouble associating the man before her to the man he had been and the man she remembered.

"Luke" she whispered uncertainly as she clutched tight to the door handle. He looked up immediately and quickly raced to her side.

"Lorelai" he muttered sadly, his arms reaching out to her cautiously. Lorelai backed away bumping her back against the open door. "I'm so sorry Lorelai" he stammered.

Lorelai stared into his eyes, searching for some spark of recognition. He was so changed, so fragile that she almost had to look away.

Emily stormed over to the pair her eyes livid as she tried to move Luke away from her daughter. "I think you should leave" she called, placing herself between them. Emily looked at her daughters expression and tried to get her back inside her room. She pulled gently on her hand fearful that Luke would make her upset.

"Come on Lorelai, you need to get back in bed" she demanded. "Wait" Lorelai gasped, staggering a little against her mother. Luke reached out for her bracing her in his arms and steadying her step. Lorelai was feeling faint as she leaned into him, her eyes still seeking some familiarity. She stumbled again as something swept across his face, making him instantly recognisable.

"There you are" she whispered as her eyes fluttered closed. "My love" she murmured as her body slumped towards the floor.

Emily screamed as Lorelai fell reaching out but failing to catch even a hair. Luke was faster, he scooped her into his arms before she reached the ground and carried her to the bed.

Emily shouted for assistance as Luke tried to rouse her, shaking her shoulder and gently calling her name.

"What happened" her doctor asked as he rushing inside the room. "She collapsed" Luke said softly, his haggard appearance causing the doctor to do a double take.

"Did she get out of bed" he asked as he examined her blood pressure. "Yes" both Luke and Emily answered.

"Okay, it's okay, her pressure has just dropped. Let her rest for a while and she should come round" explained the doctor. He moved towards the door turning back to explain. "I'm sorry I have another patient I need to see. Don't let her get out of bed again, okay." "Okay" Emily muttered as the doctor walked away.


	22. Chapter 22

Lorelai woke to the feeling of fingers running through her hair, she turned her head to see Luke caressing it gently.

"Luke," she croaked as the shock of his appearance hit her again.

"Lorelai," he asked relief written all over his face. "I was starting to doubt I would ever see those eyes again," he confessed.

Lorelai sighed her hand reaching up to touch his face, disbelief etched in her every action. "Are you really here," she asked uncertainly. "I'm here," he whispered.

"You left," she whispered back as she watched a tear drop from his face and land on her pillow.

"I'm so sorry Lorelai," Luke confessed. "I never should have left you, never. I was stupid and scared. I stopped thinking about you and Rory and thought only of myself. How this all affected me and not you, I was so selfish Lorelai."

Lorelai listened patiently to Luke's rant, outwardly understanding his actions. But inside she felt an enormous sense of abandonment, not for herself but for her daughter. Rory had been left to deal with everything alone when Luke had left and to forgive Luke meant forgetting what he had put her daughter through.

"Luke," Lorelai suddenly voiced cutting him off mid rant. "I'm not sure if I can forgive you right now. But I think I can understand how you were feeling. You love me, maybe too much and when I got sick you couldn't cope. But Luke Rory loves me too and she managed to stick around, I just wish you had too."

"Lorelai I'm so sorry, as insignificant as those words are I am so truly sorry. I never meant to hurt you or Rory. I'd do anything for you and Rory."

"Anything but stick around," Lorelai lamented.

"Lorelai please," Luke sobbed as he grabbed her hand tightly and pressed it to his heart. "I love you, I've always loved you. Can't you see that the thought of losing you kills me," Luke sobbed.

"I see that," Lorelai muttered her eyes focused on her lap. "Lorelai," Luke questioned sadly as he watched a tear slide down her cheek.

"Lorelai, please look at me." Luke begged, gently wiping her tears away with the back of his hand.

Lorelai slowly raised her head to look at him, gasping at his altered looks. "I think I've already killed you," she said softly.

"What," Luke asked confused. "Luke have you looked at yourself lately, your a mess buddy," Lorelai replied a fleeting smile breaking across her face.

Luke returned the smile nervously and brushed back the hair from her face solemnly. "I'm a mess without you, I was a fool to walk away. I need you, I need you to breath."

They were quiet for a while after Luke's confession. Lorelai letting his words sink in and Luke giving her the time she needed. Finally she took a deep breath and announced tenderly, "I need you too."


	23. Chapter 23

Lorelai nodding her head as she absently listened to her doctor. "I want you to take it easy, do you here me. No running around after everyone, plenty of rest and try to limit any stress," he said.

Lorelai was thinking about Luke, daydreaming about his return and completely missing what her doctor was saying.

"Lorelai are you listening," Emily suddenly shouted, snapping Lorelai out of her reverie.

"Yes," Lorelai stated as her dreamy smile quickly vanished to be replaced with a scowl.

"Okay, well then your good to go. Any problems and I want you to come back straight away. Your prescription should be ready at the pharmacy. Do you have any questions."

Lorelai shook her head but Emily was ready and quickly began firing questions at the doctor that would have put Rory skills as a journalist to shame.

Finally Emily paused to take a breath and Lorelai effectively cut her off, "Please can we just go now."

Emily sighed as she turned towards her daughter, but seeing the impatience on her face she soon relented.

She stood and offered Lorelai her hand as they slowly left the room where Lorelai had spent so much time.

"I'm free," Lorelai announced as they walked along the corridor. "I can't believe they finally let me go, I thought I'd never escape," she confessed.

Emily just smiled in return as she inwardly let out a sigh of relief. They're had been times when she feared her daughter would never leave the hospital too.

"Is Rory here," she asked shaking Emily back to the present.

"No, she's with William," Emily replied evasively. Lorelai tried not to look too disappointed at the news but determinedly avoided asking about Luke.

Luke was still a very sore subject for her mother. She had reluctantly endured his presence over the past few weeks but she was still very angry and upset about their reunion.

Rory had taken his return better than her grandparents but she found she could no longer trust him. She lived in constant fear that he would leave again, leaving her anxious and always on edge.

Emily drove back slowly to Lorelai's house, shooting glances at her daughter and asking repeatedly if she was okay.

"Mom, please I'm fine. Nothing to worry about," she barked making Emily jump in alarm.

Emily sighed turning her eyes back to the road. She was scared all the time now, worried sick about Lorelai. She tried her best not to show it but sometimes she failed to mask her anxiety. Lorelai's health was still incredibly precarious and it was slowly sinking in for Emily just how close she had come to losing her daughter.

Finally they pulled up to Lorelai's driveway and slowly walked up the steps to the front door.

"Surprise!" various voices echoed as the pair entered the house. Lorelai stepped back in amazement as she saw the people who meant the most to her, all gathered in her living room.

Babette and Patty stood on the outskirts of the group, next was Sookie, Jackson and their children all smiling happily at Lorelai's return.

Richard and Mia stood side by side enjoying the scene and in the centre was Rory, holding William tightly in her arms.

"Welcome home Mom," she said softly. "We missed you."

Lorelai dashed towards the centre, her arms spread wide as she embraced her children. "I missed you too," she sobbed. "I missed my babies."

Rory laughed at the idea of being lumped in with her baby brother but allowed it, so glad to have her mother home.

Everyone wished Lorelai well and soon the small gathering turned into a very orderly party. Drinks were passed round and snacks quickly appeared, all courtesy of Sookie.

Once the party was in full swing Rory gently steered Lorelai towards her bedroom. "I had to keep him away from the others," she said mysteriously.

Confused Lorelai stepped inside her daughters bedroom and there standing behind the door rubbing his hands nervously was Luke.

"You came," Lorelai whispered softy.

"Of course I came," he replied. "Sorry about the theatrics but Rory was concerned about your parents reactions if I came to the actual party."

"You came," Lorelai just repeated. Luke stepped closer and swept her into his arms, "I wouldn't have missed it." he confirmed.

Lorelai spent the rest of her party dividing her time between her friends and family in one room and Luke in another. She encouraged him to join in the main party but he wouldn't leave Rory's room no matter how hard she begged.

"I'm fine here Lorelai, I don't want to create anymore conflict for you with your parents," he confessed.

"Fine," Lorelai relented as she reluctantly left to join the party in her living room.

Eventually the party died down and her friends left to let Lorelai get some rest. Emily lingered as she helped Rory clear away and Richard helped Lorelai put William down for a nap.

"You'll call if you need anything," Richard asked as he watched her rock her son to sleep. "I'll call," Lorelai replied softly.

"Promise," he asked as brushed his hand across her shoulder. "Promise," she asserted confidently.

Emily and Richard left soon after and Mia took over helping to clear away the party detritus. "Why don't you take a nap honey," she said as she noticed how tired Lorelai had become.

"I'm fine," Lorelai shrugged as she went to spring Luke from Rory's bedroom. Mia looked up as Luke suddenly appeared in the kitchen and shook her head comically.

"That explains a lot. I wondered why you kept disappearing into Rory's room," Mia remarked. "Yeah, who knew Rory was harbouring him right under my parents noses," Lorelai smirked.

"Well I thought you might want him here," Rory announced her tone causing Lorelai a little concern.

"I did, thanks hon. You really are my favourite daughter, so thoughtful," she confessed solemnly.

"The fact that I'm your only daughter, change anything for you," Rory asked.

"Nothing," her mother said beaming at Rory.

Lorelai then slumped into the nearest chair and yawned loudly. " Lorelai I really think you should rest for a while, you look a little pale," Luke entreated affectionately.

"Will you come," Lorelai asked shamelessly. "If you promise to rest I'll come," Luke replied.

Lorelai nodded and Luke led her up the stairs to her bedroom, waving a goodbye to Rory and Mia.

As she lay down on her bed Luke watched her uncertainly, desperate to join her but scared to make the first move.

"I need you here," Lorelai commanded, patting the empty side of the bed. Luke leapt into the bed at her word and gently wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

Lorelai leaned her head to his chest and breathed in his scent reverently. "Oh Luke, I missed you so much," she confessed.

Luke let out a sigh as he tensed at her words, "I'm sorry Lorelai."

"Me too," Lorelai said relaxing into his touch. Luke stroked her hair with his fingers while he squeezed her gently with his other arm.

"I love you Lorelai," he suddenly exclaimed. But Lorelai didn't reply she was already fast asleep, safe in the arms of the man she loved.

Luke listened to her steady breathing and knew she was out, he bend his head and kissed the top of her head solemnly.

"I love you Lorelai, don't leave me all alone," he whispered. "Your my life and I can't live without my life," he muttered softly in her ear.


End file.
